Reset – Day 58

It’s only day 58 but technically it’s the last of the 5 day a week series with Ralph. All in all, I’m glad I did it. It was expensive, but I am in a much better headspace than I was when I started. I’m enjoying exercise, and feeling better in my skin. I have recognized that this is nothing I will ever be done with, it’s just part of my life now. All the coming changes are purely logistical.

I will admit that I have some fear about the coming weeks, because I don’t have my safety net. Ralph won’t be expecting me to show up at a certain time on Tuesday and Thursday, so it’s on me to have a plan and execute it.

I will continue reporting, for accountability and for the sake of writing something. I tried to start a creative project the other day and ended up typing and deleting, typing and deleting. I know you’re supposed to just do it anyway, but when I’m not feeling it, everything I write feels like complete trash and I hate it and it makes me not want to write. So I give up. Perhaps if I just keep going with the trash I’ll break through with something decent again. We shall see. That’s a project for another time. I have lunch with my BFF on Saturday and she is an actual writer, so I’m hoping that she can help me get on a path that leads somewhere.